Silver lining behind blue clouds can come much much later.
Much later dat u no longer feel the need for its existence cos u already have another silver heart.
Why silver heart? Cos gold is the symbol of perfection and only God is all perfect.

I read an article on the newspaper today. It was re-phrased by his son dat i was not good enuff to be in the family due to my soiled garment. Maybe when u are too good in sumting dat u forgot dat u can never be perfect except Allah, God then gave u lil taste of humiliation to make u nearer to humility. A little stain by u is incomparable to my soiled garment dat was caused by another but u will feel the lil humiliation and maybe more so dat u are reminded dat not us who put the value of another being. I accept the fact dat i was never good enuff for your precious and picked up my lil pieces of heart as i left. I wish ur family well especially ur wife who was nice to me from the start. True, i am not denying the fact dat ur precious son is never meant for me.

The cousin was safely buried yesterday's morning. This time and for the first time since i was 9, i was very close to the body. She looked so calm n beautiful tho she died of kidney failure. She told us a few mths ago that she dreamt of Yayi when she was so sick. It scared her dat time but this time, i guess its not. Its really time for her to go tho there are lotsa worldly success waiting for her like a sucessful reply to her application as a teacher and scholarships. I cried the moment Puza hugged me. Every cousins cried cos we knoe how we were all not there for her. Her lil brother who quarelled w her cried the most, couldnt even bare to kiss her and seemed in denial. My uncle too. Parents, they thot their kids going to kiss their cold foreheads as they sleep but not this time. I knoe we all wont feel so much of her loss yet but wait till weddings, Ramadhan and Hari Raya. We will knoe she is not there cos she wont be bickering w her naughty siblings telling them to shower and smiling at us whenever we turn. Nuratiqah Ruma'in left us when she is 18 to be w Yayi and Mok Da.

Al-Fateha.