Hurt

Just too much to study for Tatabhs. Too much n i think kinda too detailed. Functions of each imbuhan and changes. Diff kinda meaning n types of Kata Tugas. If i really am gonna memorize all those things, i will be like a walking Tatabhs Dewan. Its a manic and i just cant handle it. Watched SPS and found out dat the charming, pleasant looking Sharon Ismail is married to a nice looking guy named Jumari. Luv her wedding dresses. So subtle, pretty, elegant yet simple. I luv the way she carry herself. I luv her flashing white smile n her intellect look too.

I am kinda sad at times due to uneasy vibes in me. I dont knoe why but i am just gonna blame it on the thot of going back to KL today plus exams altho i knoe those are not the reasons. I just refuse to indulge n layankan this unhealthy vibes. I am gonna solat Hajat again but dont think i can make it tonight. Just on my pc n msn to wait for Sharky. Need to confirm wat time. Wish i can see Eagle perform today but i dont think i can. Eagle kinda sounded disappointed when i gave an alasan dat i am going back. I neva get to watch him perform. I was surprised to find out dat Masada's fren wanna get to knoe me. I thot he is one of the old acquaintance dat i might forget but nah, haf not seen him. He is a drummer in a local band too. I knoe he has a gf and was wondering conservatively why would he wanna get to knoe me. Ppl haf always been interesting n puzzling w their beliefs n character. Just gonna befriend then. Nothing more and i shud get dat cos i dont wanna get involve w guys anymore especially this chap who is attached. I hope i get to knoe the gf too lah. She looked scarry to me and the kinda dat gonna jump onto conclusion n slapped my face. I dont wanna get entangled w girlfrens too. I smell problem.

Frankly, i wish i am luckier. Already found and be with the man i adore. Being attacked by jealous gfs are just emotionally draining out for me especially when i dont even meet the guys and just being normal frens. Sumtimes, knowing the gfs also not enuff. Pls God, if its gonna lead me into SHIT just let the guy forget abt getting to knoe me. I dont wanna get hurt unnecessarily.